Manic Depression Mixed in Life

What to say...an illness to overcome every single day. It leaves me on my knees to pray...Lord, have you left me here alone?Can I see anyone?Please release me from this disease. A cleansing is an understatement for sure and I am writing now by God's grace. I am alive by God's grace. I will be strong again by His love and grace and through the gentle touch of friends and family near and far. I must be surrounded by people in this time. The long time adventurer is now in a corner fighting her way out. I have become so quiet and observant...just don't want to stir any waters. How will God use that? Such bravery was taken from this soul who headed out West looking for a new life to start. Now I am back in the trenches of an illness that does not let up. But I know that the sun is coming...coming to shine on the shadows that bring fear to my heart. Please Lord help me.